Original Article: http://dartreview.com/archives/1998/04/29/a_wicked_cool_bar.php
Wednesday, April 29, 1998
If you're friends from Harvard tell you they don't go to the Grille...they are lying. If they tell you they only go because their friends go...they are lying. If they tell you that they only go because their fake id/jacked-up-library-card won't get them in any other bars...they are not lying. I am a Harvard freshman. I am nineteen years old, but according to my id(courtesy of Review gopher Barrett Thornhill) I am twenty-five year-old polish-native-american steel worker from Illinois Tonto Kowalski. I have never been given the neg at the Grille.
When I say 'The Grille' I am referring to The Crimson SportsGrille, located a couple of minutes from Harvard Square and frequented by Harvard students of all ages. Some are there to 'party down,' others to relive memories of Freshman year. The Grille is a kind of default location for many underclassmen party seekers on a Friday or Saturday night.
Most nights begin with the same old dialogue, 'I'm checkin' out this kegger in Mather house,' 'Cool, I heard about this toga thing in Cabot,' 'I'll meet you both at the Grille at 11.' The Grille simply is a large part of Harvard's social scene for those who have not yet reached 21. And, to be honest, it's not that bad, if you follow a few simple guidelines.
The most essential component of a successful Grille run is timing, especially on Friday and Saturday nights. How many times have I slipped up and delayed my journey down JFK street until midnight?
This is a critical tactical error. I usually end up waiting in line outside for about twenty minutes.
I finally get in and have to plough through the crowd which has accumulated around the bar. It's too crowded for me to flag down the bartender that knows me, so I settle for a five dollar pitcher of Red Dog; then, I wade back through the crowd to the chairs, where I can count on my friends to remind me that I am indeed an idiot, and that I should have been there over an hour ago.
I next kick myself in the ass once again as I realize that what should have been an hour of my watching Sportscenter on the big screen has become me staring at the giant heads of other freshmen who are not even watching the damn screen. So be advised, get there early.
This allows you to get a seat for a while, get a few drinks before the mob arrives, and ask your bartender to make that four dollar Morgan and Coke worth your while. Soon, the place will be so crowded that you'll be glad you're already drunk when it becomes a major effort to secure a place at the bar.
Now that should pretty well cover you for Friday and Saturday. Thursday is a pretty similar story. The Grille will once again end the night packed wall to wall, but sixty to seventy percent of the population will be from Boston College.
The strategy changes a little here. The line effect is still relevant, but not as important. A midnight arrival won't land you in a twenty minute line usually, but why risk it? Guys, especially, listen to this next section.
On Thursday only bring about twenty dollars to the Grille. You will most likely be relieved of all twenty dollars. This is the B.C. effect. I have seen guys spend fifty to sixty bucks buying drinks for girls from B.C.
This is not to say that buying drinks for B.C. girls is in some way demented, only that if you bring less money you will be more selective in who gets those drinks. And while we are the topic of money, DON'T OPEN A CREDIT CARD TAB.
If you're out of money, borrow some. People will be drunk enough to give you however much you want(and if you're really careful they won't remember a thing about the whole transaction).
Bottom line — credit cards at the Grille are dangerous and will result in unfettered weeping upon sobriety. But to finish up on B.C. night, the same perils exist as those on a Friday or Saturday. It's gonna get 'wicked' crowded eventually, yada yada.
Now, some of you might be thinking: why is this Harvard geek complaining about a popular bar that doesn't id hard and attracts girls from the greater Boston area?
The answer: it's the same thing practically every damn weekend. The Grille is pretty fun the first few hundred times you're there. Then it starts to dance on the border of tedium.
Some variety can be maintained by switching to Guinness or Goldschlager for a night, but those are usually the nights you end up with an empty wallet, a credit card statement from hell and a longing for Red Dog. So, they can be none too frequent.
Actually, the best time you'll have at the Grille is Wednesday night, promo night. Promo's come about every third Wednesday, Free shirts, hats, poster , etc. flow freely and the crowd is perfect.
The regulars all show up and enough others to create a perfect atmosphere for some good bar drinking, and it's empty enough that you can walk or talk without extreme effort. Free stuff and atmosphere = good night at the Grille.
For those who can't make the effort on a Wednesday, the only tactic is denial and self-delusion. Some people call the Grille by a different name, like 'Das Grill' or 'Las Grilla.' Others will try to convince themselves that 'Man, I haven't been THERE in a while...uh,let's go tonight.' Nobody is fooled, but we don't have the heart to shatter anyone else's dream world.
Anyway, if you haven't gotten a good feel for the Grille, just picture a fraternity. Only you have to pay for drinks, there's no band, it closes at two, and you have to pay for drinks. But don't be discouraged, if you ever fire up the snow ploughs and make it out of Hanover, stop by the old Grille. Buy me a couple of drinks, wait for the inevitable appearance of my credit card, and enjoy the bountiful plenty of The Grille.