The Greeks Shall Inherit the EarthEditor's Note: Presented here for your consideration and enjoyment are brief pen-portraits of Dartmouth's venerable fraternites and sororities. Some might accuse us of trafficking in generalities; to our defense, we hope that these sketches will serve as fine, humorous introductions to the true hardword of the College. Astute readers may notice that the photo-graphs are somewhat out-of-date. In fact, most are culled from the Dartmothiana of the late nineteenth-century. Many of the residences have since been rebuilt.
Rich in character and steeped in tradition, Alpha Chi alledgedly popularized the vogue phrase, 'Nobody rages anymore.' So do they? Well, having just undergone major renovations that've just transformed a modest cottage into a sprawling palazzo, we suppose we'll see. In any event, there isn't any pong being played within these walls. A house pledge, like Hester Prynne, can be identified by his scarlet cap.
It's something of a cardinal sin to be ignorant of that fact that the capers of AD brothers were the basis for the classic picture Animal House. Whether the depiction is still accurate is open to debate; they do claim, however, what is undoubtedly the grimmest basement on campus—it usually doubles as an open sewer. Soccer and rugby players make up a good portion of the brotherhood, which is one of the strongest on campus. The AD Lawn Party during Green Key weekend is always well-attended.
BG is just coming off the tail-end of a long string of disciplinary actions and social probations; the question is for how long. Chill, relaxed, and laid back, they enjoy a good time, which probably accounts for their at-times tempestous relationship with the administration. They're known for their live bands, usually jam, jazz, or funk.
Chi Gam's reputation already has broad campus circulation and you've probably caught on already, though in fairness the house has actually changed a good deal over the past few years. All in all, these are solid guys, many of them athletes. They come as they are. But we'd be remiss if we didn't mention that a Chi Gam party generally entails (a) D.J.s manning the ones-and-twos, (b) kegs, (c) flashing lights, and (d) gyrating brothers.
'Hockey players'—a few years ago, that would have summed it up. While the Heorots of today can't be so blatantly stereotyped, they still enjoy whapping the puck. Yes, whacking the puck—that's what they're all about. Whapping the puck. Whapping the puck. Read into that what you will.
'Football players'—a few years ago, that would have summed it up. Well, it does these days too. They try to keep it medium-rare, but sometimes things fall through. The pit in the basement was originally designed as a swimming pool, but for safety reasons was soon converted to a basketball court. That didn't work out either; now it's primarily used for more bibulous basement activities.
LULLULFIET is a latino affinity organization. Like Alpha Phi Alpha their presence on campus is limited as they do not have social events or a physical plant.
Tri Kap is probably the most diverse brotherhood on campus and probably the oldest local fraternity, dating to 1842. Beer pong is taken very seriously here—if you're a novice, call next at your own risk. They're also fond of dance parties (bring your glow-sticks).
The Rig. The big white house on Webster Avenue. Ye Old School House. A bunch of boozers, brawlers, burners, and social outcasts—in the best senses of the terms. That notwithstanding, and though many campus leaders—esp. in the Greek system and the Rugby club—call Phi Delt home, brothers are always excited to return to their fortes: hanging out, and doing nothing. If in coversation your confabulator liberally peppers his discourse with words like 'rig,' 'grim,' 'soil,' 'basement,' or 'Ya Heard?' you're probably talking to a Phi Delt.
While not really a 'fraternity' in the traditional sense of the word, 14 Webster Avenue is legendary for its debaucherous partying, loose morals, and out-of-control, anything-goes behavior. We hear Susan Wright is a real dinner party animal; if you've got the stuff, try to score an invite to her annual 'Administrators Gone Wild' gala ball. Former President James O. Freedman had a grotto installed in the backyard, which we hear can be quite sensuous in the right company.
Creator and former host of the Winter Carnival Keg Jump, once arguably Dartmouth's most notorious event but now banned by the administration, Psi U still turns their front yard into a skating rink in the wintertime anyways. There are dozens of small handles on the low-hanging ceiling in part of the basement, presumably so that brothers can swing about from place to place without sullying their feet on the atrociously grim floor. Quite a few brothers play country club sports like squash, sailing, and golf.
Until recently many Sig Nus were also affliated with the marching band or the Lord of the Rings society. But don't let that discourage you. They're a group of gregarious, genuine, and friendly guys who are prepared to chug, boot, and die, as their oft-repeated slogan suggests. Sig Nu is popular for it early-eighties party, which is always a blast. And they've done a lot of work that's really helped the Greek system.
If Sig Ep were a processed food, it would definitely come in 'family size,' like a fifty-gallon drum of mayonnaise at Costco's. They've got the largest brotherhood among fraternities and the highest G.P.A. of any Greek house. They even call their particular variety of pong 'Death.' At the same time, they pride themselves on moderation. The house's pledge term (a misnomer: it's nonexistent, really) is organized around a 'Balanced Man' program that emphasizes love, service, and character.
Theta Delts are the sweetest guys on campus—just ask them, and they'll tell you, it's true. Everyone else plays checkers; they play chess. Everyone else plays Shutes and Ladders; they play Hungry Hungry Hippos.
Zete is Dartmouth's only independent fraternity and the only house you can join before your sophomore year. Known for their Thursday night 'Tails and strict pong rules, the house has been an object of mystery and speculation in past years. However, those familiar with it enjoy the friendly, non-threatening basement scene and amiable brothers there.
These historically African-American sororities are devoted to community service and a variety of dance known as stepping. Beyond that, we're rather ignorant of these organizations—sorry, you'll have to find out for yourself.
The sharp-eyed passer-by might notice the Greek characters 'Beta Theta Pi' installed above Alpha Z's door. In its heyday, Beta was known for such hijinks as holding bottle-rocket wars or full-scale riots with neighbors Zete and Phi Delt. Although the fraternity has been extinct since 1996, their corporation still owns the house, which it leases to the sisters of AZD. Alpha Xi Motto: The pen is mightier than the sword.
The Sisters of the House of the Three Delts can be prim and proper, but they're also warm and welcoming. And they don't just know how to have a good time—they know how to bake. The kind of girls you can take home to the parents.
Formerly the Harold Parmington Foundation (HPF), these brassy ladies are tip-top starlets. Theta boasts a very strong sisterhood.
A local sorority, KDE throws parties that can out-do most fraternities. Also, when spring rolls around, look for guys in seersucker and girls in sun hats walking up Webster Avenue to KDE's Derby Days party, a celebration of all things aristocratic. Beneficiaries of a recent, massive renovation, the sisters of KDE now enjoy the most spacious basement of any house on campus. Motto: Freedom lies in being bold.
Located down past the gym, Kappa rarely plays host to any notable social functions, but they do enjoy dieting. These gals are a staple on the Greek circuit.
SAE is well-heeled, to say the least; they use their superfluous funds to throw champagne parties, go tanning, and sport designer clothing, always with the collars popped forth. SAE's winter beach party entices hordes of scantily clad youths to trudge throw the snow and frolic in the tons of sand they import for the event. Motto: Be a true gentleman.
This past summer a handful of Sigma Delt sisters started a streaking club—Novack Cafe on busy nights is probably your best bet to catch a glimpse. They throw one very large, very popular dance party a term. Nice, opinionated girls in general, who won't take any guff.
Alpha Thetas used to be a more rambunctious lot—in the late seventies they used to get juiced up and drive their cars relentlessly around Phi Tau until they were apprehended by the authorities or the thrill was gone, whichever came first. The event was called the Phi Tau 500 and stemmed from an old rivalry between the two houses: both, you see, were, and are, co-ed. These days, as with most of the College's more reckless traditions, the Phi Tau 500 is no more. Alpha Theta has mellowed out as well. Today, they are known more for their capes and top hats than their antics behind the wheel.
If one were charitable, he might characterize Phi Tau as eccentric; were he more acrimonious, the description would probably be flat-out weird. At the same time, they embrace their oddity and aren't ashamed to demonstrate it. Hey, if you've got it, flaunt it. Phi Tau's termly bash, Milque and Cookies, literally features thousands of diverse cookies and a thick dairy bevering brewed in cauldrons by galley slaves in the back rooms. Sadly, it is non-alcoholic.
A progressive house for many years, Tabards belong to a bountiful cornucopia of diverse tastes, attitudes, and backgrounds. It's an eclectic mix that can often be quite enthralling. How does that sound? |
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