Original Article: http://dartreview.com/archives/2004/10/04/the_last_word.php
Monday, October 4, 2004
I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: 'O Lord, make my enemies ridiculous." And God granted it.
—Voltaire
I will have naught to do with a man who can blow hot and cold with the same breath.
—Aesop
I have the heart of a child. I keep it in a jar on my shelf.
—Robert Bloch
When I do good, I feel good. When I do bad, I feel bad. And that is my religion.
—Abraham Lincoln
The people who cast the votes do not decide an election, the people who count the votes do.
—Joseph Stalin
Why was I born with such contemporaries?
—Oscar Wilde
Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.
—Mark Twain
They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.
—Benjamin Franklin
A liar should have a good memory.
—Quintilian
All Reformers, however strict their social conscience, live in houses just as big as they can pay for.
—Logan Pearsall Smith
College isn't the place to go for ideas.
—Hellen Keller
He wins every hand who mingles profit with pleasure.
—Horace
The best way to keep one's word is not to give it.
—Napoleon Bonaparte
Misogynist: A man who hates women as much as women hate one another.
—H.L. Mencken
Partying is such sweet sorrow.
—Robert Byrne
My country owes me nothing. It gave me, as it gives every boy and girl, a chance. It gave me schooling, independence of action, opportunity for service and honor. In no other land could a boy from a country village, without inheritance or influential friends, look forward with unbounded hope.
—Herbert Hoover
Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.
—P.J. O'Rourke
Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art...It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival.
—C.S. Lewis
Watch out for the fellow who talks about putting things in order! Putting things in order always means getting other people under your control.
—Denis Diderot
Nobody can give you freedom. Nobody can give you equality or justice or anything. If you're a man, you take it.
—Malcolm X
I can hire one half of the working class to kill the other half.
—Jay Gould
That all men are equal is a proposition which, at ordinary times, no sane individual has ever given his assent.
—Aldous Huxley
I once said, "We will bury you," and I got into trouble with it. Of course we will not bury you with a shovel. Your own working class will bury you.
—Nikita Khrushchev
O Lord, help me to be pure, but not yet.
—Saint Augustine
Coal is a portable climate.
—Ralph Waldo Emerson
The same principles which at first lead to skepticism, pursued to a certain extent bring men back to common sense.
—George Berkeley