Original Article: http://dartreview.com/archives/2005/09/22/the_last_word.php
Thursday, September 22, 2005
It is, Sir, as I have said, a small college. And yet there are those who love it.
– Daniel Webster
Most people tire of a lecture in ten minutes; clever people can do it in five. Sensible people never go to lectures at all.
– Stephen Leacock
I would insist that the person who spends four years in our north country and does not learn to hear the melody of rustling leaves or does not learn to love the wash of racing brooks over their rocky beds in spring - who has never experiened the repose to be found on lakes and rivers, who has not stood enthralled on top of Moosilauke on a moonlit night or has not become a worshipper of color as the sun sets from one of Hanover's hills; who has not thrilled at the whiteness of the snow-clad countryside in winter or at the flaming forest of the fall - I would insist that this person has not reached out for some of the most worthwhile educational values accessible at Dartmouth.
– Ernest Martin Hopkins
Liberals have invented whole college majors--psychology, sociology, women's studies--to prove that nothing is anybody's fault.
– P J O'Rourke
I am not impressed by the Ivy League establishments. Of course they graduate the best - it's all they'll take, leaving to others the problem of educating the country. They will give you an education the way the banks will give you money - provided you can prove to their satisfaction that you don't need it.
– Peter DeVries
Soap and education are not as sudden as a massacre, but they are more deadly in the long run.
– Mark Twain
When asked, while an Oxford undergraduate, what he did for his college, "I drink for it."
– Evelyn Waugh
The lewd licentiousness and damning debauchery of Leb and the Junk are not for you, ye doddering digits of destiny. Look well to thy youthful innocence lest ye soon find it gone.
– Dartmouth Freshmen Guide, 1926
A university is what a college becomes when the faculty loses interest in the students.
– John Ciard
Common to all staff was a conviction that they could have done better outside education. The teachers believed in a mysterious world outside the school called 'business' where money was handed out freely.
– Michael Green
The Idea of what is true Merit, should also be often presented to Youth, explain'd and impress'd on their Minds, as consisting in an Inclination join'd with an Ability to serve Mankind, one's Country, Friends and Family; which Ability is (with the Blessing of God) to be acquir'd or greatly encreas'd by true Learning; and should indeed be the great Aim and End of all Learning.
– Benjamin Franklin
When I get leisure for it, I will endeavor to hint to you some of the reasons why I think the Indians of this land are the Ten tribes of the House of Israel.
– Eleazar Wheelock
A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad.
– Theodore Roosevelt
Let us all ... acknowledge that today, as yesterday, this college is the beneficiary of a heritage great in both purpose and spirit. Most especially, being products of this place, let us never lose our awareness... that we are custodians of Dartmouth's immortality and individuality.
– John Sloan Dickey
Consider [the pedagogue] in his highest incarnation: the university professor. What is his function? Simply to pass on to fresh generations of numskulls a body of so-called knowledge that is fragmentary, unimportant, and, in large part, untrue.
– H L Mencken
Dartmouth is what a college should look like.
– Dwight Eisenhower
Education with socialists, it's like sex, all right so long as you don't have to pay for it.
– Alan Bennet
Men hang out their signs indicative of their respective trades. Shoemakers hang out a gigantic shoe; jewelers a monster watch; even the dentist hangs out a gold tooth; but up in the mountains of New Hampshire, God Almighty has hung out a sign to show that there He Makes Men.
– Daniel Webster