The Week in Review

Thursday, September 22, 2005

Beer Beats Libraries

Just a few weeks ago, the Princeton Review released its annual college rankings. Dartmouth made the cut in six categories, though none were in the top ten. The College was ranked #16 for the "Best College Library," and was named the seventeenth-hardest college in which to gain admission to. Dartmouth also received accolades for its campus food (#11) and the overall student quality of life (#20). Fraternities and sororities at the College also made the cut; the Greek scene was ranked #13 and the College as a whole was ranked #15 for having "lots of beer." The rankings, though frequently varying due to the inaccurate student survey method used, are widely used by prestige-whoring Buzzflood acolytes to pick name-brand colleges and universities to attend.

Tuck Ranked #1

Forbes recently ranked the College's Tuck School of Business the best business school in the country. It was the first time in the history of the biennial rankings that Harvard Business School had not nabbed the number one spot. The magazine praised Tuck for its income gain; the average Tuck graduate had an annual salary increase of eight-four percent over their pre-Tuck compensation, one of the top increases in the nation. The Wharton School at Penn and the University of Chicago Business School rounded out the top three.

NCAA Bans Indian Mascots – Sort Of

The NCAA recently banned schools that use Indian mascots from displaying their mascots in national tournament competitions. The decision quickly aroused the ire of schools such as North Dakota and Florida State, both of whom use their mascots (Fighting Sioux and Seminoles, respectively), with the approval of their respective tribes. When Florida State threatened to sue, though, the NCAA quickly reversed its tracks and made an exception for the Seminoles. Curiously, the NCAA refused to force the University of North Carolina-Pembroke to change its "Braves" mascot, citing the university's exemplary history of graduating Indians. Dartmouth, however, did not win a similar exemption, despite having graduated more than 500 Indians since 1970.

Sheehan "Vigil" Mars Hanover

On the night of August 17, a crowd of anti-war activists converged on the corner of Main and East Wheelock streets to hold a "vigil." They were there to support Cindy Sheehan and (ostensibly) American soldiers. Drawing from traditional leftist tactics, they preached to the choir and substituted rational arguments for unabashedly self-absorbed, emotional appeals. It was, however, a strange sight, with passing cars honking in support (out of the ordinary for a vigil, we think) and the Hanover Inn's jazz band interrupting the somber mood. Unfortunately, this sort of spectacle occurs far too often at Dartmouth, and this won't be the last instance of vagrant rabble dirtying our streets.

WARNING TO FRESHMEN: AVOID ORIENTATION

Freshmen: Orientation is perhaps the most malign waste of time you will ever have the displeasure to endure. Listening to a lecture on that book you were supposed to (but didn't) read this summer will only put you to sleep. Sitting through explanations of the right and wrong methods of casual sex is as bizarre as it sounds. Your next four years will be filled with enough diversity-worship without the 'Experiences' presentation, which focuses on the blind-and-deaf Filipino hockey player, and the gay hermaphroditic mulatto Jew who heads the Ivy Council. And, you really don't need a highly-paid motivational speaker to understand the dangers of alcohol (the first time you wake up covered in your own vomit will suffice). So, kids, sleep-in, black-out, and enjoy your last chance for a week without deadlines hanging over your head. Just don't be that loser taken to the hospital by ambulance halfway through orientation because he decided to show his new college friends what a sweet dude he is by chugging a handle of vodka.

The Week in Review

Article Tools

Related Articles