The Last Word

By Jared Zelski | Thursday, September 27, 2007

Life is a sexually transmitted disease.
—R. D. Laing

College isn’t the place to go for ideas.
—Helen Keller

A book is a version of the world. If you do not like it, ignore it; or offer your own version in return.
—Salman Rushdie

Someone’s boring me. I think it’s me.
—Dylan Thomas

Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen.
—Albert Einstein

A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin.
—H. L. Mencken

Even if you do learn to speak correct English, whom are you going to speak it to?
—Clarence Darrow

Life is something that happens when you can’t get to sleep.
—Fran Lebowitz

Bacchus hath drowned more men than Neptune.
—Dr. Thomas Fuller

The nice thing about being a celebrity is that when you bore people, they think it’s their fault.
—Henry Kissinger

A fool’s brain digests philosophy into folly, science into superstition, and art into pedantry. Hence University education.
—George Bernard Shaw

Reality is a crutch for people who can’t cope with drugs.
—Lily Tomlin

Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance.
—Will Durant

It is a great thing to know our vices.
—Cicero

Cynics regarded everybody as equally corrupt... Idealists regarded everybody as equally corrupt, except themselves.
—Robert Anton Wilson

Living is easy with eyes closed, misunderstanding all you see.
—John Lennon

People are difficult to govern because they have too much knowledge.
—Lao-tzu

Death’s brother, Sleep.
—Virgil

My pessimism extends to the point of even suspecting the sincerity of the pessimists.
—Jean Rostand

Work is the curse of the drinking classes.
—Oscar Wilde

In the absence of clearly-defined goals, we become strangely loyal to performing daily trivia until ultimately we become enslaved by it.
—Robert Heinlein

Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.
—Jules Renard

Idleness is not doing nothing. Idleness is being free to do anything.
—Floyd Dell

Have no fear of perfection—you’ll never reach it.
—Salvador Dali

A university is what a college becomes when the faculty loses interest in students.
—John Ciardi

Knowledge and timber shouldn’t be much used till they are seasoned.
—Oliver Wendell Holmes

The outcome of any serious research can only be to make two questions grow where only one grew before.
—Thorstein Veblen

The Last Word

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