More on the Sexual Assult

Not that I know anything more about it, but allow me some speculation.

1. The male is a Dartmouth student (but not a Tabardite)

-He’s not in Tabard because he’d be busted by now (brilliant deduction, I know)

-He’s not a townie because I doubt anyone from town would be in a basement at 4am without any of his friends

-He’s not a thru-hiker because the season’s over

-He’s not a visiting student from Harvard or something because they tend to hang out with their host

-By my math that makes him a Dartmouth student

2. This was on the serious end of the vague term “sexual assult”

-If it was some drunk dipshit who tried to stick his hand up her shirt, he’d have turned himself in. Better to do that than be recognized walking across the Green six months from now.

-If it is more serious, he’ll run like there’s no tomorrow because HP will track him down like the POS he is.

3. He’s shaved his goatee

-If he is a student, he’s got nowhere to run to.

If I’m right about the second part, then this guy is the scum of the earth and should be taken out back and shot in the face. If I’m right about the first part, then he’s living in your dorm. I don’t want to start a TIPS program or anything, but this ain’t tough people: if your neighbor just shaved his goatee and bleached his hair… 646-2234 (S&S) 643-2222 (HP).